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2016年9月4日 星期日

Day 613—How I use my hot flash to support myself 6

Day 613—How I use my hot flash to support myself 6




Reactions towards my hot flash

After all the work I mentioned in the previous sharing, there left about half times of the hot flash occurrences in a day comparing to the beginning stage. However, not long after I enjoyed the accomplishment, I went to the opposite state of the mind. Obviously, at this stage while focusing on the process of dealing with the symptom, I had manifested the polarized mind reaction patterns and consequences towards the hot flash and myself and the all treatment process, and also ignored and accepted the mind process. Here is my observation.

With the worrying and fearing of the symptom in the beginning, to the exciting and amazing of the information gained from kinesiology, and the desiring and expectations for the perfect outcome during the dealing process, to the satisfaction and enjoyment of the accomplishment, and then finally, I indulging myself in the disappointing and blaming for the last part that seemed I cannot do anything more about them. Thus then I take the chance to introspect the reaction process including the mind and physical reactions and all the backchats in my DIP assignment which required me to investigate the fear preprogramming pattern in daily life.

One observation is that in the final stage I observed the hot flashes still has a few emotional ones as well as plain heat ones, my frustration can be easily triggered by the former, and then create backchats patterns, except the believe that I got more responsibility for the emotional ones, it seemed I also took on the emotional energy to create more energy and personalities.

And from what I was blaming myself and the hot flash and the process, I see my hot flashes was in a way taking placed from two kinds of resources or effects, one is the long-term mind pattern consequence manifested in physical, one is the current backchats and reactions from immediate or short-term environmental stimuli. I have learned from quantum mind serious interviews from EQAFE that we can only be aware of the consequence of the quantum mind’s and quantum physical’s effect, therefore what we can do is to not to participate the reactions of the mind and to find the things trigger the reactions and do self-forgiveness for the points and mind structure to prevent from it in the future and thus change oneself. And through such works I could and already reduce about half of the hot flashes, however it would not be possible to just undo them all within such a short period of time, but require deeper insights through time and also physical support, for the existence of the symptom still shows me that my body is damaging itself through the long term consequence condition.

On finding the answer to understand how far my process can do about it and decide the treatment afterwards, I discussed it with my buddy, and found her reply confirmed the answer already within me, then, what I need to do is just to stop the old mind reaction patterns towards the hot flash and myself and proceed the next stop, which is to go to the doctor for medical treatment to support my body.

Now I just done a month’s dosage of the hormone treatment and now I got only a couple of times of mild hot flash a day, and then doctor offered me the continuous prescription and suggested me to use it according to my own estimation. What I would do is to take as small amount as possible with my process to ease the symptom.

To be continue…



2016年8月31日 星期三

Day 612—How I use my hot flash to support myself 5


Day 612—How I use my hot flash to support myself 5


Other emotional points

With the end of stomach point, I identified other emotions that would relate to my hot flashes, such as irritation and anxiety which related to my everyday life activities. They would involve in very immediate environment stimuli and the reaction would start from a bigger area of my body above from the middle chest and back area to the middle of my head region and I would feel the heat slowly emerged from this part. It’s quite similar with type of hot flash with the plain heat, but it can be sensed that there was an uncomfortable emotional source which starts the whole thing.

When I found these situations that different types of emotions would relate to the immediate environment stimuli or situations easily to be ignored in the busy life, from just a sight of something, or a very quick perception of the mind that I were not aware of and there even has no thought involved then the next thing inevitable is the setting off of the hot flash, and from the observation I felt the panic towards my process, I figured this is the kind of mind reactions as physical backchat happened in the quantum mind and quantum physical levels described in the quantum mind interview series of EQAFE, but how I can do anything to stop the reaction processes from those things seemed randomly occurred around me now and then? God knows how much countless things are there waiting really? Is it possible for me to walk through them all?

However I also see at least the good news is that through my hot flash experiences I proved there are things there reveal themselves for me and thus I got chances to do something with them, better than just sitting there and do nothing and react to what is there actually supporting me, thus I decided to on the one hand to even slower my movement and thus to face the irritation mind structure within me, and on the other hand to trace back and recording those stimuli and instances from the environment while I experience those hot flashes, they would be like when I was measuring some proportions; picking something from a pile of things; dealing with a puzzle; reading some information without understanding; a kind of exhibiting way of a store, and so on. Thus the next time before I go into the similar environments or join these similar activities I can remain myself to breath and focus on the physical reality.

And yes, it also worked, at least for those I can identified circumstances I can just slow and calm down myself from rush into them and thus prevent the irritations and thus the hot flash happening, and from what has been worked successfully, I got more confidence to keep on going dealing with these mind patterns.

To be continue…



2016年8月23日 星期二

Day 610—How I use my hot flash to support myself 3

Day 610—How I use my hot flash to support myself 3




Kinesiology  

In the session of Kinesiology the Kinesiologist told me that in relation to my hormone problem, what tested out was that mostly it has something to do with my internal conversation in relation to a specific person which is my father, and those backchats towards and in relation to my father are charged with positive feelings as well as negative emotions and those emotions also been tested out is insensitive, reserved, weary, cold, uncaring and unresponsive, which already become my own emotions patterns through copying and learning from and with my father to protect myself as a protection mechanism and those are located in the mind level of subconscious, unconscious, quantum mind, quantum physical.

Within the session I also crossed reference and clarified some other questions related to hot flash and thus I knew the intensity and duration would be influenced by the level of what is going on in the mind that I am participating and believing in my backchat. And I also confirmed the royal jelly and exercise is helping, also I can massage my foot to ground myself, and I got some suggestions of EQAFE interviews to support my process.

I was quite astonished and excited to know all these information at once, and with the backchat in relation to my father I recalled not long ago I had a thought about he didn’t response to my recent sickness with a slight of those emotions attached to it and also some memories of my childhood, however I actually dealt with the major conflicts and emotions towards my father in my teenage years and that had made us quite in an equal communicated relationship for a long time already.

Then I realized, yes, those emotions and personalities has become me already, and that belongs to one of my major personalities and for recent two years since I am actively making friends and finding potential partners and which is quite an emotional process…, so obviously, I had applied those mind patterns to those potential partner relationships, it could be the reason my hot flash was getting serious and it is clear that I still had quite some mind patterns need to face and to stop the relevant thoughts and memories and thus solve problems with my relationship and my body conditions.

Now I got the names and clues of emotions related to my relationships and personalities which manifested as the backchat in the mind, so every time when the hot flash coming, I can be more easily aware of and trace back to the internal conversations and imaginations in my mind that had things to do with the emotions and relationship personalities.

It is quite an interesting journey for me to investigate and analyze all the connections and sources, and I also in the end of a day wrote down the memories I can assess to those thoughts and emotions, and within the realization I deconstruct and do self-forgiveness and commit myself to stop those internal conversation towards those relationships. Since I had dealt with my relationships for years, it is now more easy and effective, although there are still some of the hot flash that I don’t have clear clue where they are coming from, however merely doing this part had already reduced some of the occurrences, so the hot flash pattern everyday new become the immediate feedback point for how effective I can dealt with and stop the relationship patterns.

To be continue……